Emotionally Focused Marital Therapy (EMFT)

EFMT helps couples to create a secure bond which leads to safety, trust and emotional contact within the relationship. This is accomplished through a reduction of the destructive cycle of hurt, assisting the “withdrawing partner” to make their needs known, and assisting the “blaming partner” to soften and take the risk of expressing his or her needs and vulnerabilities.

With help, the couple learns to recognize, validate and acknowledge their individual needs and each other’s needs. Trust is built from expressing, receiving and meeting emotional needs. Safety is built from in-session coaching which shows the couple how to stop the cycle of increasing anger and distress, and get onto a more positive track of mutual needs meeting. Emotional contact is built from learning that they can do things differently and get better results.

Basically, all humans seek security in an ever changing world. Some have a sense of insecurity within themselves believing, usually subconsciously, that they are “unlovable”. The focus of EFMT is on reducing insecurities and creating new and better connections. This is accomplished by creating new emotional experiences within the couple relationship, which in turn creates new points of emotional contact with each other. These experiences encourage couples to connect, to explore and to integrate (absorb) new positive memories into the relationship. Thus the relationship grows and deepens as our most basic security needs are met in the relationship.